Category: Non-Music

Had the pleasure of meeting up with Floyd London(aka Matt Julians) & Sophie Denny today. Floyd is a survivor of Acute Myeloid Leukaemia (diag. Sept 04) & the erstwhile bassist of the rock group “The Almighty” Sophie is highly knowlegeable and an active campaigner for Leukaemia Research. They recently arranged a mega-concert for charity and Floyd is often in the media spotlight. It was great to meet them again and chat about our experiences, Floyd had some pretty dicey moments along the way but is looking great now. Floyd and Soph were recently married. Aw.

You can see some pics of the day here as well as some pre-leuk pics of Floyd in finest rock form. In the words of the Almighty, a message to cancer:

“Welcome To Defiance”

FYB, Milt:)

What are you all giving up for Lent? i have decided on two things in particular:

Abstinence and self-control.

I’ll let you know how I get on, I appreciate all your support in my endeavours, hopefully I can do it. Milt 🙂

Wow look at the Day above! My re-Birthday looms. A slice of marrow cake perchance? What news you ask? Well, details pending, I have been asked to do A 10k men-only (boo) run for cancerBACUP on the 28th May 2006 in Regent’s Park. The theme is ‘Heroes’ (i.e. running for you personal hero and/or simply dressing up) I think I’m going to avoid the expected choices of Superman, Spiderman et al in favour of something else. However, since not many people would recognize Stravinsky (Heroic musical pioneer) I have another idea which I will share soon. Anyone interested in taking part or even sponsoring me please stay tuned for details. I will report back on my (gulp) training soon. Ish.

Next Thursday I am giving an open lecture at the York Gate museum (Royal Academy of Music) on new aspects of technology regarding composition & performance. Should be fun, but a lot more preparation required!

The other day I visited the lovely Jessica Mason. As mentioned before, Jess is a 23-year old Aussie living in London. She is trained as a nurse but has serious artistic tendencies and talent. On 28th December 2005, Jess was diagnosed with ALL. She is currently in phase II of UKALL treatment at the Royal Free and is doing great in the face of the heavy treatment (I know it all too well) BMT plans are unclear. We had a great chat about art, music, leukaemia, mortality, atheism, cat behaviour and chinese food. I send my best wishes to her, her boyfriend Chris and her mum during these ‘interesting’ times. I am moved by her bravery, spirit and wisdom in dealing with her leukaemia. Ripper Mate!! (check out the pictures)

More soon, loads going on…but must dash.

Milt J x

You would think that nothing could surprise me any more. I had a busy but absorbing week at work fine-tuning my studio at the Royal Academy of Music-[/nerd mode on] May I just say that Miller & Kreisel 5.1 Speakers & Audient Mixing consoles is about as good as audio gets.[/nerd mode off]

Was all set for a relaxing weekend when Bridget came back from work complaining about feeling slightly unwell. Well her condition worsened throughout the night, until she was screaming in AGONY with stomach pain. The usual home remedies didn’t work, so after a telephone consulation with an NHS emergency nurse, I had no choice but to call an ambulance. It was horrilble to watch her suffering. By this time Bridget was delirious with pain and vomiting in a manner that would make an exorcist suddenly remember he had another meeting planned. Well the ambulance came and we had the blue light treatment to good old Charing Cross Hospital (my home for 3 months).

She was given a cannular, some anti-sickness medication and a one hour saline drip. Verdict: Gastroenteritus, cause unknown.(possibly food poisoning). Fortunately she has been recovering well despite shakiness and loss of appetite for the next couple of days. I tried to look after her as best I could. It was, of course, very ironic and ‘slightly’ amusing to have such a role reversal, but I am very grateful it passed quickly. Wanna see some pics? She is doing fine now and despite my protestations plans to return to work tomorrow. Can I just say that where it matters, the NHS are fantastic and a very civilized entity.(My US friends, the NHS (National Health Service) treats ALL people equally regardless of insurance or income for FREE. We all pay through taxes, the concept is that our health is no-ones ‘fault’ and everyone’s responsibility. That is a further issue I have with such practices as smoking, as it unnecessarily costs everybody by increasing the load on healthcare. Of course it is seriously underfunded and people will complain of waiting ages for new hips etc, but I am biased by my superb (and free) treatment-the costs otherwise would have amounted to the value of a nice little flat in London!)

In other news, I found a stash of hospital pictures and movies that never made it to the editing stage. Gigabytes of them. I’ll start to sort over the next few weeks and post things up of interest.

You may have noticed Bridget’s Sheryl Crow T-shirt- she is a big fan. (As am I- she is an extremely talented musician, has an incredible voice and as a sexy 44-year old child-free independent & creative woman is really inspirational) Ironically about the same time Bridget was dripped up, Sheryl Crow was undergoing treatment for Breast Cancer (early stages) Reminds me that cancer really is everywhere, no-one is immune and nothing is guaranteed. So get on with everything you know you want to do. Now.

My 8-year old buddy, Daniel has been given a date for his Bone Marrow Transplant: 16th March. Thinking of him and his family.

Now go on and enjoy yourselves, milt

Hello everyone, just a quick update before I collapse into a bed- I am living life to the full these days but am getting rather behind on sleep -So am learning to pace myself and to stay motivated but on a slower burn. It’s not working.
It was great to see an article on the EGO concert in Guitar Techniques Magazine (April 2006 p 15) Have a look. Nice to see.
Bridge has a great column on the Mixolydian mode in the same magazine. She has been getting back on track after one hell of a year and has some lovely new audio clips on her site. Go have a peek when you have a free lane on the “Information Superhighway” (Is that really a worse name than ‘World Wide Web?’ – Why, oh why did we not call it ‘The Matrix’ ,’CyberSphere”, ‘The Data Multiverse’ or ‘The Nexus’?? What a waste! )

On Tuesday I visited the lovely Jess Mason- A 23-year old aussie girl being treated for ALL in the Royal Free Hospital. It was a real pleasure to meet her. She is suffering without internet access, when will hospitals realize that Broadband ranks above Television, Hifi and a landline phone in terms of basic civilized human needs? – Don’t know if this is the case in other parts of the world, but the exploiatation of patients in terms of phone call prices in hopsitals is deeply criminal. Leeches.

My best wishes, respect and encouragement to Jess Mason, Daniel Kerkhoff and all of you going through a BIG challenge. You can do it.

Milt 🙂

Just got back from a trip to Sheffield to visit the Kerkhoff family (Jan, Neil, Antony & Daniel). Here are some pictures. 8-year old Daniel was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia when he was 4. He has spent a daunting amount of his life undergoing treatment, and at the end of last year, unfortunately exerienced a relapse of the leukaemia. An unrelated Bone Marrow Transplant is planned for March. This will involve total body irradiation & chemotherapy. Understandably, Jan & Neil are very concerned about him, but Daniel remains as brave, positive and undaunted as ever. We all went bowling and had a mickyD’s ( a Mer-mickyD’s?). Indidentally, I ate like a pig: my appetite is back with an agenda. I had a great day and Daniel is very brave, calm, uncomplaining and extremely funny. I also had the pleasure of meeting Paula Westnidge and her 11-year old son, Liam. Liam was diagnosed a year ago with non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. He seemed to be coping very well with his treatment. He is also a pretty mean electric guitarist- A tidy player with good time! We jammed some AC/DC and Maiden:)

Enoying the company of the Kerkhoff family, I missed my last train home and had to stay the night. This had nothing to do with their projection screen and Sky movies subscription, of course:)
I slept under a Sheffield United Football Team duvet, and dreamt about when I was 8 years old, ski-ing in Switzerland without a care in the world.

Follow Your Bliss, and please give blood and register your marrow, milt:)

I received an email today, from a lady who is desperately looking for a bone marrow match for her son.
If you have healthy bone marrow then please, please consider registering. It is quick and easy. In most likelihood that would be it and you could continue your life knowing that you’ve done something good. If you actually became a donor then you would have the opportunity to save someone’s life(with negligible personal risk)
How do you think that would feel? Go on, do a good thing and have a chance to be someone’s personal hero: register
The amazing jazz saxophonist Michael Brecker is in a similiar situation.

FYB, Milt P.s. if you do register, let me know so I can show my appreciation:)

I have a new video up. It is designed as a desensitization tool for the needlephobic. Breath deep and watch and repeat. Bye, milt

Okay I had a blood test yesterday and the results were ‘perfect’: WBC: normal RBC: normal Platelets: normal HGB: 12.1 (slightly low for male, but normal for female blood!)
There doesn’t seem to be any sign of infection. I am now off the Septrim-leaving just 2 daily tablets of penicillin as my leukaemia treatment. I now go in for routine check-ups at Hammersmith Hospital just once a month. Compare that to Day 8 (16th Apil 2005)

20-hour anti-sickness drugs, 20-hour liquid morphine, 3 x 10-minute antibiotic syringes, 1-hour antibiotic drip, 20-hour Osmolite ‘feed’, 6-hour hydration drip. 3-hour immuno-suppresant, 10-minute methotrexate chemo injection, 2-hour saline drip, 2 blood-tests, 1 Chest X-Ray, 10 ‘obs’ (blood pressure, pulse, oxygen saturation and temperature readings), 1-hour magnesium drip, 5-minute piriton injection, 1-hour platelet transfusion, 12 antibiotic/antifungal tablets, 6 antibiotic mouthwashes and 2 soluble paracetamol.

Some change I guess?

I have a new EGO event planned. It is going to be sooooo good. Want a sneak preview?

I will pin down a date, venue and personnel in the next few weeks- wanna come?

Man, I had a weird experience today. I was led to a site of a band I played with once. There is a promo video on the site and it has a couple of close ups of me.
What is strange is that I unknowingly had Leukaemia at the time. Which kind of explains me not looking too well in the vid. If you want to see what someone in the early stages of leukaemia looks like: Click here then click the Natural Woman(live) clip.

Yesterday saw a concert at Radley College of Bridget’s guitar students. It was really impressive! – both Bridget’s work and the talents of the kids. Hopefully they’ll all go into politics or banking and leave my patch alone 😉

More soon, I am working on my first vid in ages:) FYB, milt

Hello all. Been working at the academy again and keeping myself busy. PHD research, directing the CTL research centre, coaching a Jazz guitar quartet, reading ‘Unweaving The Rainbow’ (Dawkins)-recommended and trying to make my home beautiful. I have also, you will be most delighted to hear, memorized all the eons, eras. periods and epochs of prehistoric earth. Thats 4.6 billion years. 4.6 BILLION? That is impossible to fathom. I mean, I remember some pretty dull religious education classes at school, and even they didn’t feel quite as long as that. I digress.

As you might have guessed I have already started the ball rolling for the next EGO event. Those of you who missed the last one, please read the reviews below before you decide that you can afford to miss this one too:) Stay tuned for info…

Last tuesday I visited a brave young man, Gareth Mace, who is at Guy’s Hospital undergoing treatment for Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia.

I was taken by the courage and stoicism of Gareth and his mother, Fiona. I will see them again soon. It seems that I am now inextricably connected to the Leukaemia community- it’s nothing that I planned but, despite how difficult it is sometimes, it’s also nothing I would change.

There’s more to say but its 1.30am and I’m super tired- Nighty Tighty-milt x

Wonderful responsees from the audience members at Saturday’s concert: Read

Hello all. Today, I sent a fax to the great guitarist (not the composer) John Williams. Those of you who don’t know him, believe me when I say that he is THE most famous (…accomplished, important and most probably talented) Classical guitarist in the world today. Bar none. I sent him a simple but heartfelt letter about my concert ,why I was doing it, my experiences with cancer and the importance of music in my healing. I was hoping for some nice words from him to announce at the concert. Anyway he calls me within an hour, and says he would be delighted to play in the concert.
So he is playing some solos and a piece or two with my guitar orchestra. It is hard to express what an honour it is for us all. I just want to thank him for his generosity in providing his phenomenal musical services-and making the event even more special for me. Read about him here

What a year. I look at the pictures from a few months ago when I was on deaths door and too weak to move and now I am playing with my own orchestra of great musicians and friends…with John Williams

Tickets are going super-fast so I may have to increase the suggested donation level. Get in there quick if you are on the fence, you don’t want to miss this.

What a year, what a life. Excuse me, I will now go and jump up and down for a bit. Then cry. Then jump up and down again.

Live your best lives people, look forward to meeting some of you on the 28th! Follow your bliss, Milton

Life is not a rehearsal, but It contains them. Just like the one we had today for my concert

It was a real blast to have so many fine and diverse guitarists together for this event, and all I had to do was get Leukaemia. Not too hard.

Why don’t you come to the concert? It is by donation so pay as little (or as much) as you like. You will hear some great musicians, meet alot of people united by a) the desire to confront cancer and/or b) the desire to celebrate music and life. Details about booking are above. Come! I am doing this for a celebration of life not for money or glory!

Till the next time… Milton

Okay, now this was a pleasant surprise: My would-be community in Dallas, Texas, when they heard I wasn’t coming created this video It was created by Ken & Kat Shimamoto. What a lovely thing to do, eh? It makes me look forward doubly to when I can get over there.

In medical news, I have inherited the Beta Thalassaemic trait from my sister. This is a condition when you have smaller, but more plentiful red blood cells. Nothing good, nothing bad but something interesting!

Am desperately trying to get the arrangements done for the concert so I’ll be off, then.

See y’all later: Texan Milt

Happy New Year! Spent the evening at our friend Felicity’s house. Dinner & then endless songs on the guitar till 4am. My kind of party. Here are my:

RESOLUTIONS*
(* I reserve the right to modify these at whim at any time during the year)

1) Enjoy/appreciate/live every day with gratitude, good humour, hope, patience blablabla
2) Be the best guitarist & musician that I can be. Do lots of gigs/creative projects.

3) Give up Caffeine. (Apart from a cappucino in early January and most days thereafter.)
4) Immerse myself in creativity and make my lifes experience a fundamental priority.
5) Get out and see the world, look after my body, take exercise
6) Make plans to move into a beautiful new home with lots of natural light, a large open-plan living-room, a music room, in a great location and a proper bedroom. Yes.
7) Spread honesty, positivity & inspiration as much as possible around me
8) Make Bridget’s year as good as I can.

9) Suck the marrow out of life!

There are many more. Feel free to post yours on the guestbook…

Make it a good one, it’s the only 2006 we have! Milton

I am back home! Apparently the infection has been adequately stamped out now. I spent each of the last 4 days like this: 6 hours of antibiotic inhaler (through a mask), 3 antibiotic drips one blood test, 10 or so general obs, an x-ray, a lot of coughing, fair amount of Xmas TV and a good 5 hours of daily guitar practice. It was the best hospital room I have ever stayed in, very clean, newly painted, a decent view, natural light, good artificial light, entertainment centre, well-sized and of course I had some music equipment to pass the time productively. Thanks for all your well wishes, I am doing okay, still a bit wobbly from the infection, isolation and powerful antibiotics. Just off to walk the London Parks with Bridget, then some music prep for the concert, a long discussion about goals for 2006 and if well enough, a party in the evening. When I was a kid I had a book about life in the future (the 21st century –woaah) and so where are my handheld video phones, computers in every home with enormous freely-accessible worldwide information library & discussion forum, powerful personal music studio, 100’s of tv channels, ultra-realistic computer games, miniturization of music libraries, alternate energy sources, space tourism, satellite navigation and smart ovens??? Oh. They are here. Okay now I want a robot called T.R.E.V.O.R. to do all the housework, advise me on fashion choices and call me ‘sir’ in a soothing monophonic tone. Flying cars, clean air and world peace now please.

Resolutions* (* I reserve the right to modify these at whim at any time during the year)

1) Enjoy/appreciate/live every day with gratitude, good humour, hope, patience arrrgh blablabla
2) Give up Caffeine. (Apart from a cappucino in early January and most days after.)
3) Immerse myself in creativity and make my lifes enjoyment

Happy New Year…love Milton

Got hit with an infection on Christmas eve and an emergency doctor came out Santa-like and prescribed antibiotics. Spent most of Christmas mumbling ‘utter nonsense’ in bed, with a fever. Bridget drove me back on Boxing day, and I have now been readmitted at Hammersmith Hoospital for antibiotic drips, tests etc. All pretty precautionary. Im feeling anywhere between fairly rotten and pretty okay. But to my great annoyance have had to postpone my USA trip AGAIN. I also am rather frustrated, I just want to feel OK and get on with things, but time to be a patient patient again. I will be staying at HH for a few days- I hope I am out for New Year’s Eve. I won’t be able to update often-but wishing you happy in-betweeny-christmas-and-new-year-thing. Bridget has been making the best of it, stocking me up with good food for my stay.

All the best- enjoy the turkey sandwiches… Milton

Okay before we are off to Wales for Xmas, I would like to wish you all very, very happy holidays. Try and leave at least a few brain cells intact after the mindless television marathons, spare a thought for the battery poultry that we devour, learn to forgive the brats for their staggering ingratitude and ability to irritate and practise ways to look surprised and delighted at yet another utterly useless present. Try and repress the urge to attack any family members, throw overcooked dinners through the window, vomit at yet another xmas card whose sole purpose is to show off pictures of their children and show how painfully happy they are, and tell that family member, that no, actually a complete analysis of the interior workings of the late 90’s Ford Mondeo is not the most rivetting account imaginable. But do remember to be grateful for what, and who you have in life. On that note I will pass you our christmas cards and wish you a wonderful time with much love.

This card is for people who are offended by the word ‘fuck’

And this one is for people who are not offended by the word ‘fuck’

Merry Xmas!!! milt xxxxxxxxxxxx

Me, again. Who else? Well I’ve been pretty busy. Things I have done these 8 months post-BMT: Travelled to the Lake District, Scotland & Greece. Played squash twice (& won twice) , cycled dozens of times. Written, with Bridget, four months of articles for Guitar Techniques Magazine, organized a big concert for January, planned a trip to Dallas, Texas for new year, presented a research paper at the University to an excellent response, got pretty drunk at an office party and ended up dancing to ‘Killing in the name’ and ‘Tubthumping’, made some important new friends, been flooded, played 2 gigs with Bridget, practised alot of guitar and have pretty much got my playing at least as good as before cancer, written a rhythmic analysis computer program, been out many times, drunk endless cappucinos, read 12 books, memorized the birth and death dates of 50 composers, 100 artists and the reigns of all the British Monarchs since 1066, won an award for ‘advancements to music technology education’,swam in the mediterranean, chatted with Frank Gambale(world-class guitarist) ,written some new music, had my videos used to train medical students, taught 5 course at the Royal Academy of Music, panelled the entrance auditions at the Royal College of Music with the fantastic guitarist, Carlos Bonnell, lost some friends, given my sister away(in marriage!), raised several thousand pounds for cancer charities, argued with complete strangers, had the car towed away, caught up with some childhood friends, spent WAAAY too much money on myself and found a new love for life and sense of self-confidence and pride. Is it enough? Not even close!

Today I went to the funeral of the pianist Chris Ross, who lost his battle with leukaemia 2 weeks ago. He was 44, possessed a rare musical talent and love of life. He also had many, many friends. I have to say it was a devastatingly sad experience, but I was profoundly moved and inspired by the courage of Marisa and Chris’ children and the stories of Chris’ life. It was wonderful to see so many people there who had been touched by his life, among them several mutual students and a one of Chris’ nurses (who was important to me also at Hammersmith Hospital) So an excruciatingly sad yet spiritually uplifting day.

So what the hell it all about? I don’t know but at the end of it all, all our life amounts to is what we leave behind in the hearts of others. Nothing more, nothing less. The one that dies with the least regrets and the greatest positive impact, wins.

So time to get on with life… Milt

I’m back. “So soon?” I hear you cry. “Yes”, I reply rather breezily. “Oh” you say. The end.

Well tickets are going- how exciting! Please come by clicking here It would be so nice to meet you and share the experience 🙂

My good friend, colleague and master violinist, Mark Messenger is running the London Marathon in aid of the Anthony Nolan Trust. I am very moved and grateful, please support him! Let me be clear: he is a musician and he is running a marathon. So do the good thing, sponsor him and feel smug for a while. Why? Because you’re worth it.

In other news, I have discovered that despite being a very mellow and peaceful guy; I am getting into arguments ALOT more than I did pre-cancer. Arguing with smokers in non-smoking areas, queue-bargers, rude service personnel, tele-sales people, Jehovah Witnesses, jobworths, cheeky students… Come to think of it I guess I’m not that peaceful. Anyway so on SATURDAY, we were out Christmas shopping having a nice time and all. Then on Kensington High Street, near the tube, I was carrying lots of bags and this woman coming towards me blew smoke right into my face. Not in an-oh-so-sexy-and-seductive way, more of I-don’t-care-about-anyone-else-way, which I find less attractive. The weird thing is, I reacted IMMEDIATELY, without thinking. I swung round as she passed and whacked her in the arse considerably hard with a bag full of domestic goods. No thought: Smoke-bag-arse. The cycle was complete. Either she was terrified, remorseful or had a prosthetic arse, because she didnt come after me. If YOU are that lady, then stop blowing smoke in my face or I’ll smack you in the arse again, and this time with the toaster. Then today, in Starbucks I was loitering looking for a seat while Bridge got the cappucinos in. A table became available and a younger woman trotted up to claim it. Now, no big deal, but I was in the queue in front of her. Pre-cancer, I would have let her take the stupid table, but today I just slipped right past her and sat down completely neutral and unphased. An argument ensued whereby she verbalized her less than generous opinions of me, and I did a shruggy “I was here first” thing. The nearby tables supported HER, cause they hadnt seen ME waiting around, but I just held my ground. She eventually backed off before kindly advising me to get “the fork off the table”- Perhaps it was dirty. It was nice of her to be so considerate despite our little difference. Anyway the point being, no-one messes with me now- I’ve faced cancer, so social disapproval is like a holiday.

Take care, but be dangerous! Milton

This entry marks the one-year anniversary of MiltCentral. Stats for the year are over 150,000 visitors,

Today is the one-year anniversary of my diagnosis. It feels like a lifetime of experience in that one short year. Some years just come and go, unnoticed. Not this one. So what have I learnt? Cancer gets just anybody, with little rhyme or reason: smoker or non-smoker, organic vegetable eater or MickyD muncher, drinker, tea-totaller, old, young, spiritualist, hedonist and nonce- all the same. I also realize that there are many things in life (TV, media, peers, ourselves) that conspire to make us forget that this is our ONE LIFE – from cradle to tomb. We are led to believe that we can just quietly plod through our lives, property ladder, career path etc and not make a fuss, don’t rock the boat and just ignore the fact that THIS IS IT. No dress rehearsal, not even a sound check. What you are doing right now is what your life is. And I must shave away with Occam’s Razor any concepts of a reward system at the end of it all.

So here I am, one year on with D’s sword still dangling precariously above me, and it begs incessantly the question: “What are you going to do with your life?” It’s a tough one but I always know the answer: Live MY life with gratitude, creativity, love, irreverence, humour and wonder.

What are YOU gonna do? Best, milton

P.S. If you wanna nice surprise- go to your local magazine dealer and locate a copy of Guitar Techniques (Winter 2005)– Now who’s that new columnist on the CD cover?

Okay, from the site stats, it seems that many people check this page often. I also get messages from newly diagnosed people every day – which is somewhat humbling, and keeps me focused on the important things. So here is another update for anyone interested:

First off, I have been contacted by a doctor who wants to use my videos to train medical students. That is both flattering and amusing to me. Let us hope they are of some benefit to medical science(?) – I imagine they are more useful to patients than doctors but am happy to help of course.

Secondly, I am arranging an amazing evening of music on the evening of January 28th 2006. This will involve an ensemble made up of some of the best Classical and Jazz guitarists in the country (and me). They all said ‘yes’ which is great. Proceeds will go to a cancer charity. London venue to be decided, watch this space(or the space above) for all the details. It will be a fantastic event. If you would like to come, or offer support in any way; then just let me know.

Thirdly, I am off to the states (Dallas, Texas) in December to play some jazz and blues gigs with my old college friend, David Karnes. If you live in the area, why not come see me? These will be my first performances post-Cancer, so I am looking forward to it, but now concerned about missing Xmas and new year with Bridge. hmmm..

I’ll sign off as I am absolutely swamped with things to do. More soon. Thought for the day: It is not what happens to us, but how we react to those events that defines who we really are.

Ta-ra for now, Milton